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Writer's picturePaul

Thank You - Crying in the Car: Update #3


Below are some high-level highlights:


Past (since last update)

  • Facilitated 2, 3-hour discussions with 7th graders and high school seniors through an exercise called “...What Do They Really Need?”. The mom of a shy 7th grade boy told us how he went on and on about wanting to “do something” about all the suffering in the world. Will be returning to this class multiple times. Am scheduled to speak to more students, and if you have a group you’d like me to speak with, let me know. This interest has led to working with national networks to mobilize and quantify student initiative impact. The goal is to get more adults in front of students and track the data so that more folks understand how to best care as they get older, whether as practitioners or volunteer people helpers.

  • Spoke on a panel for a conference called Love Epidemic 2. Video linked here. It focused on equipping folks in trauma-informed care and skills.

  • Took part in a 2-day “city-wide transformation workshop with Ford Taylor of Transformational Leadership called Unify Dayton. This group seeks to catalyze city-wide healing through uniting and mobilizing leaders to mobilize others.

  • Led a mobilizing meeting with a missions leadership team (10 folks) at local church. They are interested in surveying their entire congregation in the beginning of January to get a pulse of everyone's existing passions, skills, and availability to best onramp their congregation in caring for vulnerable children and fragile families in their community.

Present (Today)

  • Most days I'm meeting amazing people, like-hearted friends and warriors throughout the region and the country, all focused on mobilizing more people to care for vulnerable children and fragile families. Too many stories to tell. Both of current amazing efforts and the potential for collective impact through partnership. Some of you receive exciting voicemails from me. I enjoy sharing with you, in real time, a highlight of the journey.

  • Learning from and connecting folks throughout the world of domestic abuse. Abuse leaves deep, lifelong and generational scars, typically for women and children. Abuse creates vulnerable children and fragile families. Watched all modules of this free program Becoming a Church that Cares Well for the Abused. It is vital to the mission of mobilization for those in the Church to understand how to best triage safety and provide ongoing relational support to those traumatized by this abuse. This training is extremely illuminating and practical for church leaders.

  • Currently at 88.91% of known support through 45 committed supporters- and we are waiting on 8 folks to provide us information on their level of support. Excited to get to 100%, and become fully-focused on the mission.

Future:

  • A couple pastors are piloting church-wide surveys to best understand the inner passions, availability, and potential roles of their congregants in caring for vulnerable children and fragile families. We hope this data will be a huge value-added to pastors in understanding their congregants, and how to best organize and support lay leaders in leading their flock up the onramps of caring.

  • Most fragile families deal with addiction and need recovery as means of healing themselves and their family. Will be sitting in on and sending folks to a rhythmic convening of faith-based and secular Addiction and Recovery services starting in January.

  • Sending many folks to the next Care Community Clinic on January 29th through Promise 686.

If you have decided on partnership and would like to finalize by filling out this form, we'd really appreciate it. And Thank You again for everyone who supports this mission and our family. We are pumped for the past, present, and future healing of vulnerable children and fragile families in our communities.


--------- BELOW, STORY SENT IN THE EMAIL ----------


I once interviewed a woman for a caseworker position, let’s call her Hope. She was so talented, kind, and Full-of-Life that we’ve stayed connected after she moved away. Her story is one of intense and long-lasting domestic abuse, a social ill I wrote many papers about in grad school.

1 and 3 women will experience domestic violence (DV). 20,000 calls are made to DV hotlines everyday. In Ohio, a call is made every 2 minutes. Last year, 109 victims, including 4 children, were killed in DV homicides in Ohio. Truly tragic.

And there is no statistical difference between domestic abuse inside and outside the church.

Last week I was crying in the car listening to a candlelight vigil program put on by a ministry/organization, Called to Peace. I visualized stories of Hope and her children. Millions of women and children are manipulated into a debilitating state of fear. Some never heal. Some lose their lives. Yet, some do Heal and turn back to heal others.

Hope found healing in a 1-year advocacy course hosted by Called to Peace - she now is a trainer. In the past week I’ve spoken with three other Called to Peace staff who assist advocates, church leaders and support group leaders in navigating their local safety and healing work.

At 10:30 am, last Thursday, I made a cold call looking for a meeting space. At 10:00 am, Jacqui, a survivor of DV, prayed to be connected to a network of people to advance her mission to help rescue and heal victims across Dayton. I also prayed to be connected to her. We talked for over an hour. We’ve dreamt of a plan to help victims and survivors find safety and healing through launching DV groups, onboarding advocates, and training people throughout the city about navigating domestic abuse. Since then, we’ve found teammates, other women, who this is their life mission. More healing is coming for our women, children and men. We’ve spoken with two shelter directors, a survivor, and a male counselor in Dayton who helps abusers heal. Jacqui is going through the year-long advocacy training. And more is coming.

Caveat; my main focus is to mobilize the church to care for vulnerable children and fragile families through three onramps; providing physical items, relational support, and welcoming a child into a home. While domestic abuse efforts are not my main focus, I am led and privileged to help connect, convene, and cheerlead champions who deeply care for the safety and healing of vulnerable children and fragile families in this way. Abuse is trauma, and most of those we serve experience this trauma in some form. It’s wise and vital for our helpers to be trained in trauma which is also the nature of domestic abuse (power and control) and the proper channels to triage safety and be a relational support for healing. All these connections will be passed off to a local leader of champions. These friends will be some of our most vital guides as we mobilize the church to more deeply care for suffering. Let me know if you know other champions in this space or if this is close to your heart.

As of today we are at 89.91%! of known support through 45 supporters for this fiscal year. Again, I'll stop sharing these #s when we become fully-funded because we'll be fully-focused. Click here to begin partnering.

Thank you for your partnership,


Paul

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